How Does Custody Work if You Are Not Married? 

 Posted on February 24, 2025 in Child Custody

Unmarried parents in Illinois have the same rights and responsibilities as married parents, but the legal process for establishing custody and parenting time is different. Without a legal presumption of paternity, unmarried fathers may need to take additional steps to secure their parental rights.

Whether you have long shared a child with someone who is not your spouse, you just found out you are the father of a child, or you are a mother expecting a child with a man to whom you are not married, you likely have questions about the custody process and what the law says about unmarried parents. For guidance on these sensitive and important questions, contact The Law Office of Nicholas W. Richardson, P.C. today to meet with our experienced Illinois family lawyer.

Illinois Law and Child Custody in 2025

The Illinois Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage Act governs child custody matters, using the terms "allocation of parental responsibilities" (decision-making authority) and "parenting time" (visitation). The legal document that has the court-approved details of a child’s care, including when the child is with each parent, is called a "parenting plan." While the Court is always there to step in when necessary, parents are encouraged to create custody plans together without court assistance whenever possible.

When Courts do need to get involved in helping parents create a parenting plan, Courts do not give preference to women or men in custody matters simply based on the parent’s gender. Instead, Illinois law weighs several important factors, including:

• The child’s relationship with each parent

• Each parent’s ability to provide a stable home

• The child's adjustment to home, school, and community

• Any history of domestic violence or substance abuse

• The willingness of each parent to encourage a relationship with the other parent

Judges prefer arrangements that allow both parents to be actively involved in the child's life unless there is evidence that one parent poses a danger to the child’s well-being. If necessary, parents can be required by a Judge to go to mediation or parenting classes to help reduce conflict around their child.

How Can an Unmarried Father Get Custody in Illinois?

Before an unmarried father can seek custody or parenting time, he must establish legal paternity; otherwise, he has no enforceable custody or visitation rights. Illinois law provides three ways for a man to show he is legally the father of a child: 

• Voluntary Acknowledgment of Paternity (VAP): Both parents sign and file a VAP form with the state when a child is born.

• Administrative Paternity Order: The Illinois Department of Healthcare and Family Services (HFS) determines paternity.

• Court-Ordered Paternity: A Judge establishes paternity, often requiring genetic testing.

Can an Unmarried Father Get Equal Custody in Illinois?

If an unmarried father establishes paternity and demonstrates involvement in the child’s life, he has the same legal right as the mother to seek an equal share of parenting time and responsibilities. Courts generally prefer joint parenting arrangements unless one parent is unfit or unwilling to cooperate.

How Are Important Decisions Made for a Child if Parents Are Not Married? 

Illinois law no longer uses the term "custody." Instead, the Court gives parents the authority to make important decisions about things like a child’s healthcare, education, religiosity, and extracurricular activities. Depending on what would be best for a child, the Court can assign decision-making power to one parent or require both parents to share responsibilities.

Contact a Rolling Meadows, IL Child Custody Lawyer

If you are an unmarried parent facing a custody dispute, having an experienced attorney can make a significant difference. A Hoffman Estates, IL child custody lawyer at The Law Office of Nicholas W. Richardson, P.C. can help you establish paternity, negotiate a fair parenting plan, and protect your parental rights. Call 847.873.6741 today for a free consultation.