Tips for Successful Co-Parenting After Your Illinois Divorce

 Posted on December 30, 2019 in Children of Divorce

After getting a divorce as a parent, you and your ex-spouse will typically have to work together to co-parent your children. This can be difficult, particularly if the divorce was bitter or messy, and there are still feelings of resentment. However, it is best if you are able to work together with your ex-spouse as peacefully and respectfully as possible. Not only will everyone benefit from this cooperation, but it can help you demonstrate that you are willing to put your children’s interests first, which may work in your favor if you need to modify the terms of your parenting plan in the future. Here are some ways you can encourage ongoing cooperation between co-parents after getting divorced:

Solve Problems Together

Although you and your ex-spouse have agreed to work together as co-parents, this does not mean that any hurt or anger that built up during the divorce will just go away. However, you will still need to be able to cooperate to meet your children’s needs and address any problems that may arise. When working to resolve these issues, you should try to put your feelings about your former spouse to the side and focus on how the two of you can reach a solution that will provide for your children’s best interests.

Maintain Open Communication

Communication about what is going on in children’s lives is one of the most important factors in successful co-parenting. By keeping your children the focal point of every conversation, the two of you can ensure that you understand their needs and are prepared to address any ongoing concerns. This will also allow you both to remain informed about what is going on in your children’s lives, including any medical or educational matters that you and your ex-spouse both need to be aware of.

Be Consistent

As co-parents, you and your ex-spouse should be equal partners in raising your children. This partnership often works best if parents provide consistency in both homes. Regardless of where a child lives most of the time, it is best if they have similar rules and routines in each household, as well as similar forms of discipline and regular schedules for meals, homework, bedtimes, etc.

Leave Your Child Out of Any Discussions

While you will need to regularly speak to your ex-spouse and make decisions about your children, you should never bring your child into those discussions or have him or her act as a middleman, delivering messages between parents. This can upend a child’s sense of stability and make him or her feel as though he or she is being forced to choose sides.

Do You Need Help With Child Custody? Call Our Palatine Divorce Lawyer

Whether you are just entering into divorce proceedings, need to address concerns about child custody, or want to make modifications to your parenting plan following your divorce, skilled Arlington Heights family law attorney Nicholas W. Richardson will negotiate effectively with the other side to help you achieve a resolution that will meet your family’s ongoing needs. Call our office today at 847.873.6741 to schedule your free consultation.

Resources:

http://www.ilga.gov/legislation/ilcs/ilcs4.asp?ActID=2086&ChapterID=59&SeqStart=6000000&SeqEnd=8300000